i was talking about jayson in my last entry and how i want him so badly (which is and will be true) but i had the best night last night... i went out with my friend obasi that i work with and went to school with and his friend john and i somehow got the sweetist boy to come with us... he came by the hot club and i was just about to get off of work... i eventually did and i went and sat at the bar and had my drink and it just so happened the only open seat was next to him... ive talked to him before... he used to work at the hc so everyone there knows him and i was thus... introduced and open to torture his poor soul...

by that i mean i asked him what his big plans were for last night and he said he had to go to the computer lab so he could work on a paper... i invited him out with obasi, john and i and the rest... well... was a whole lot of fun.. we laughed all night and my stomach is sleepy now but we all hung out till about 4am... we went for last call that the hot club but all ended up with a water or a coke... we take the troupe over to ob's and hung out there till pretty late...

we walked out at the same time and he asked what i was doing and i said going home and eating and reading probably... he invited me back. i told him in all honesty i wanted to but i didnt think i should...

but the torture him was he came out with us and didnt go to the computer lab... and thus... didnt go to his class today... its the only class he has and its 12 hours long... so its sort of important to go... so i feel terrible and i didnt even give it up... what a bitch... hehhehhhehehehhe

but i think were going to get some food... i was supposed to be getting in the shower an hour ago...

what an asshole i am

but why does this happen??? things were seeming to come to some point with jayson and i put no faith in us getting back together but... why when it seems like were making some way in things... does he come and get thrown into the mix and confuse the piss out of me???